My life goes through many changes everyday. Most are insignificant and go unnoticed. There are weeks that I will eat vegetables on Saturday instead of Sunday. I sometimes get an ice cream cone instead of a milkshake. Today I went to a different gas station than I usually do. These are simple changes to my daily routine. I never change my habit of having coffee first thing in the morning. Some things I can’t imagine changing.
However, there are days when I have been slammed with changes that I just can’t wrap my mind around. I have experienced too many of these throughout my many years.
I experienced the death of both parents when they were too young to die. I watched my mother age into an older woman when my 18 year old brother was sent to Vietnam as a Marine. I saw my grandmother agonize over losing her daughters before she died; this was not the natural order of life and death.
I have watched a very young man go through security at the airport on his way to Germany to find his way; all the time I was praying and hoping he would come back to us. He did. He made the necessary changes to his life.
I have watched a special friend pack up and leave to start a new life around the world, knowing that one day she would be assigned to a danger zone. She will soon report to Afghanistan.
In the past year my house mate and myself have both been diagnosed with Cancer. We have also lost 2 dogs and 2 cats during this time. These changes have changed the both of us significantly.
I do believe in many ways they have been positive. I must say it hasn’t all been pleasant, but we have been able to learn more from these experiences than we thought we could. As long we are capable of learning to accept change we are capable of seeing tomorrow.
We are now getting ready for a road trip! We have done many vacations and road trips in the past, but this one has a special excitement to it as we plan. The two (2) of us are going to drive to Washington DC and meet up with the other golden girl who will be in training for Afghanistan. We all will travel together to upstate New York for college graduation. Our young man will be graduating from Vassar College.
The most amazing statement above is probably that the two (2) of us are driving solo to Washington DC. We have never been responsible for the driving especially in a city. That in itself makes it an adventure.
It is no surprise to any of us that our young man (it took a small village) is completing his education. He set his goal and did what he needed to accomplish this. It’s all his. He owns it.
It is also no surprise to us that our friend is in training for Afghanistan; she has a passion and desire to succeed in her new career and will do what is necessary to accomplish this. She is finding her own way. We will hope and pray that she comes back to us safely.
Change is hard. We will make it to DC. and then all be proud as he walks across the stage to collect his diploma in NY. She will make it to Afghanistan after a short visit home.
More changes will continue to come our way. Our graduate will make his way to Africa via the Peace Corps. The two of us will end up back here in SC with each of them on different continents around the world.
We will continue our Cancer Treatments. We will not acquire any more pets.
We will celebrate their successes and be proud of both of them. We will miss them. Change is hard.
Change doesn’t haven’t to be bad.
Change isn’t necessarily good for everyone.
I tell everyone it’s hard on me because I’m old, but in all actuality change has always been tough for me; I’ve never been someone that accepted it easily.
I’ve had people tell me over and over to just accept it. When someone can find the answer that tells me how to do that I’ll gladly listen.
The only sure thing is that today is done and won’t come back to me.
Tomorrow is mine.
I like to say that I make choices based on what is best for me and others in my life. However, I am no different than anyone else. I can rationalize whatever choices I make and convince myself they are the right choices regardless of how they might change or affect others lives.
After all isn’t that what everyone does.
Choices create Change. Change is Hard.